Love, American Style
Somehow I got into a conversation with my ex boyfriend today about the film The Notebook of all things. It was my fault. I mentioned a satrical Vanity Fair article I read that opined how men almost subconsciously avoid films featuring actor Ryan Gosling for reasons they don’t care to admit. The writer of this particular article seemed to think The Notebook, the sappy Southern love story set in the 40s starring Gosling, might have something to do with it.
If you haven’t heard of The Notebook you’re living under a rock. It was a book before it was a film and I myself dodged the story for quite some time. It took a rainy day and the flu to compel me to see for myself what all the fuss was about. Yes, it is a lovey-dovey, sappy story, but to my surprise it moved me to tears and apparently I’m not the only one.
I’ve heard stories of grown men who wept watching this “chick flick.” When I mentioned it to Adam he was unfamiliar with the story. No surprise there. But, when I gave him the recap his instant reaction was absolute- no way. Still no surprise…
I completely get why men resist. To be fair, I stay clear of war and shooter-up movies because I have a hard time looking past the violence and testosterone-driven story. Interestingly though, the whole premise of The Notebook is such an easy target for criticism from modern men and women alike. We live in a world where that kind of love story is foolish. I mean what kind of guy would write his girl a letter every day for a year? That’s the kind of devotion, passion and commitment that we only see in old movies or read about on Valentine’s Day. You know the stories I’m talking about ones of happenstance or instant attraction that lasted a lifetime. These stories seem so old-fashioned. I wonder why? Is it fear of being vulnerable or fear of losing one’s independence? I’m sure it’s a combination of a whole bunch of things I really don’t feel like continuing to analyze, but it’s made me take notice.
If you haven’t heard of The Notebook you’re living under a rock. It was a book before it was a film and I myself dodged the story for quite some time. It took a rainy day and the flu to compel me to see for myself what all the fuss was about. Yes, it is a lovey-dovey, sappy story, but to my surprise it moved me to tears and apparently I’m not the only one.
I’ve heard stories of grown men who wept watching this “chick flick.” When I mentioned it to Adam he was unfamiliar with the story. No surprise there. But, when I gave him the recap his instant reaction was absolute- no way. Still no surprise…
I completely get why men resist. To be fair, I stay clear of war and shooter-up movies because I have a hard time looking past the violence and testosterone-driven story. Interestingly though, the whole premise of The Notebook is such an easy target for criticism from modern men and women alike. We live in a world where that kind of love story is foolish. I mean what kind of guy would write his girl a letter every day for a year? That’s the kind of devotion, passion and commitment that we only see in old movies or read about on Valentine’s Day. You know the stories I’m talking about ones of happenstance or instant attraction that lasted a lifetime. These stories seem so old-fashioned. I wonder why? Is it fear of being vulnerable or fear of losing one’s independence? I’m sure it’s a combination of a whole bunch of things I really don’t feel like continuing to analyze, but it’s made me take notice.
posted by Erin at 9:43 PM
6 Comments:
EC-
I feel misrepresnted in this article-at least my point is misconstrued. True love and vulnerability aren't polarizing topics for me: it was the excruciatingly trite story and all of the cliche narrative details therein, which elicited such an excruciating sigh from me. As a theme true love, obviously, is totally worth exploring ...As a film fan, I would just want it delivered in a better package. -Adam Steinberg
Hey now, I just felt the need to express my thoughts about why men in general might stay away from this film. In no way was I implying that love and vulnerability are polarizing topics for you, AS. I don't think that at all. I do know however that your reaction was based solely on a synopsis of the story, but I’m not trying to fight you or imply anything. My thoughts on yesterday’s convo took another turn once I began thinking about modern day love stories. Also, I want to be clear that in no way am I recommending this movie as a “must see.” But, if I can be surprised by my reaction to it, why shouldn't others?
ok. agreed.
I don't wanna get in the middle of this, but as another emotional detached human, who NEVER cries at movies and is hardly moved by them...I gave the Notebook a chance on a rainy day and actually really liked it. Did you know that Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams are a couple in *real* life too??? C-razie!
I know! They had really good chemistry in the film! I'm sure they had the hots for each other back then :)
Great blog... You know my mom and sis have been trying to get me to watch The Notebook and even I resisted since I tend to avoid chick flicks. Maybe I'll add it to my queue now...
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